Venting + problem-solving in the same conversation is underrated
We’re often told to separate emotions from decision-making.
“Don’t vent, just focus on solutions.”
But that’s bullshit.
Some of the best ideas come after you’ve said out loud how fucking frustrating something is.
Venting and problem-solving in the same conversation is underrated because:
1. Venting clears the mental clutter
When you’re stuck, your brain is usually looping in frustration instead of moving forward.
Getting it all out unfiltered makes space for actual solutions.
Holding it in just means you’re frustrated AND pretending you’re not, which is useless.
2. You get to the real problem faster
The first thing you complain about is never the actual problem.
Example: “This whole system is broken.” → Okay, but which part? → Oh, wait, it’s actually just this one step that makes everything else harder.
If you skip venting, you waste time fixing the wrong thing.
3. People ignore solutions when they don’t feel heard
Logic doesn’t solve frustration. If people feel dismissed, they won’t care about your fix.
Venting first lets you acknowledge the actual frustration before moving to a solution.
Otherwise, you’re just slapping solutions onto a problem no one is mentally ready to fix.
4. The best ideas come mid-rant
Ever been in a rant and suddenly gone: “This is so fucking stupid, I wish we could just - wait… we actually could."
That’s when you know you’re onto something.
How to make this actually work
Obviously, not every conversation should be a meltdown. The key is balancing venting with action:
- Let it out. Say all the frustration, no filter.
- Spot the patterns. What’s actually broken?
- Flip it into action. What do we need to change so we don’t have this same rant in six months?
Venting without action is just complaining. But forcing solutions without venting is like trying to be productive while drowning.
You need both. The best conversations - the ones that actually fix shit - start with acknowledging what’s frustrating, why it sucks, and THEN figuring out how to change it.
I’m thinking about venting + problem-solving workshops with clients. Is anyone doing that already?